Storm in a Coffee Cup

I like these rejects from the controversial The Way I See It Starbucks campaign. Mine would be something like:

"The Way I See It #666
It's way too early in the fucking morning to read a coffee cup and tilt my head at an unnatural angle and potentially pour scalding coffee all over myself and I can't believe I paid $3 for a cup of coffee even if I do have a crush on the barista (or should it be baristo if it's a boy?). I'm such a corporate sheep. Mehhhh".
but guess what - they didn't ask me.

I have been knitting like crazy but I can't post pictures because the results are going to be birthday/Christmas presents. Who will the lucky, lucky recipients be? Right now, I'm knitting with this yarn I dyed with Kool-Aid. It is amazingly indelible; a lesson to mothers everywhere. I want to try some more ambitious dying sometime - it's really a lot of fun, and if you screw up, you can just dunk it in a shitload of grape Kool-Aid and get a nice dark gothy purple.

This news skeeves me out. Ever since Magnolia, my mental image of Tom Cruise involves tighty-whities and a huge fake erection, and makes me want to join AVEN immediately. Anyway, here's my haiku written in honor of the proud parents:

TomKat with kitten
Scientology cures all
Results fool no-one

This is sort of interesting: a map of relative values in different cultures. I'm surprised the USA isn't further down on the traditional/secular-rational scale than it is. I'm sure if this survey was split into blue and red states, the red states would be hovering near the bottom. I want to live in a yellow country! A houseboat in Amsterdam would do nicely, thank you.

I thought the two-day stubble thing was low maintenance. But apparently not. Laser beard sculpturing is de riguer. Try telling that to the lovely scruffy men I work with. There's something exceedingly off-putting about that amount of grooming. Like let's pretend we're not human but malleable Ken dolls. Bleaugh.

Have you noticed the 'kid brother' in the current Olive Garden ads is strangely like a junior Carrot Top? Note: please do not click this link if you have any kind of sexuality or clown issues. Where's that link to AVEN again?